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Tuesday, December 04, 2012

Tis The Season

Today I took Sebastian and Jen to get haircuts.  While we waited for Jen’s hair to be finished, Bastian asked me if I was getting into the holiday spirit.  It was such an odd question, and for me, held a complex answer.  I’m not as good at dodging questions as Andrea is, but I’ve taken a few notes from her play book.  I replied to Sebastian with, “I hung the socks up today.”  He brightened - and I daresay looked relieved - and replied, “Oh, then I guess you are! I am, too, I think.”

Yeah.  The holidays are upon us and so is the mood they bring.  For me, that mood isn’t full of yuletide cheer the way it is for some.  My parents are dead.  My grandparents are dead.  I won’t be getting Christmas cards from them, and as I never send any out, I won’t likely get them from anyone else, either.  Tomorrow is dday.  The last week has been full of rain and wind and fog and the upcoming week will be more of the same, which I love, but it doesn’t help with the darkness growing inside.  So yeah, the holiday spirit is creeping up on me like a creeper in a horror flick, and I’m not enjoying the feeling at all.

I put on face for Sebastian, though.  My mom ruined more than a few birthdays and Christmases and I don’t want to become that.  Fake it til you make it, right?  Something like that.

I’m just… tired.  Really tired.

Posted by Liberty on 12/04 at 06:20 PM
Posted under: See-Through

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