Friday, February 21, 2003

SPAM

If you have anything you want/need me to read feel free to send it to me, but I am really not interested in email forwards.  Whether they are ASCII angels, political propaganda, prayer chains, petitions, or virus warnings please feel free to keep them to yourself.  _I am not interested_.  I’ve seen all the ASCII art I ever wanted to in college when I was using a VAX system (trust me, ASCII hasn’t gotten any better), my political and religious beliefs don’t need any boost, and truly, I have an excellent virus protection program.  In regards to the War on Terrorism, well, we’re using common sense to fight that battle and it seems to be working quite well so far so I don’t need any more tips, tricks or goddamned duct tape.

I don’t have a penis, therefore I don’t need to enlarge it.  I have not now, nor will I probably ever invest in you, your company, your stock, or your MLM scam.  I don’t *want* to buy any email addresses from you, and frankly I’m more than a little pissed off that you had the nerve to buy mine.  My sex drive is great, I don’t need anymore pheromones and I have no intention of buying any diet program via an email from a stranger concerning an unknown probably ill reputabled company.

I don’t want to see photos of you or help you test out your webcam.  I don’t want to see nude photos of anyone, much less women fucking animals or underage teens.  I don’t need or want free passwords to porn.  I don’t need porn.  No porn.  None.  Got it?

My skin is already as youthful as it’s ever going to get, I don’t need any sort of descrambler and for fuck’s sake stop asking me to buy goddamned ink from you because if my printer cartridge runs out, I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend three hours of my already pathetic life trying to shoot up with plastic syringes and staining ink.  Buying a new one suits me just fine, and no, really, I don’t need you to sell me one, I know where Best Buy is.

If you feel like writing and telling me how your day is or what color your socks are, hey, I’d be glad to read and reply to that.  I’m always interested in updates and actual conversation, but this sort of thing isn’t my cup of tea.  If I wanted this information, I have free access to Snopes and other websites and will seek them out when/if I find that necessary.

In the meantime, please @set me=!SPAM

Thanks.

Posted by Mommy at 05:06 PM

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